How to Get a Prenuptial Agreement: Step by Step
Last updated 8 min read
Getting a prenup takes 60–120 days and 6 steps: decide if you need one, talk to your partner, each hire your own attorney, exchange full disclosure, negotiate, and sign at least 30 days before the wedding. The whole sequence depends on starting early. This page walks through each step in plain English. It isn't legal advice.
Step 1: Decide whether you actually need one
Run through the questions in our do-I-need-a-prenup guide. If the answer is yes, set a target signing date at least 30 days before the wedding (7 days minimum in California by statute, but always aim for more).
Step 2: Start the conversation with your partner
Before either of you talks to a lawyer, talk to each other. The prenup conversation is the stress test of how you handle money disagreements. Don't skip it because it's uncomfortable.
Step 3: Each partner hires their own attorney
Joint representation by one attorney is among the most common reasons courts later set prenups aside. Each spouse retains their own family law attorney licensed in your state. Look for specialists with prenup-specific experience.
Step 4: Both spouses produce full financial disclosure
Sworn schedules listing every asset, debt, and income source. Specific values, recent statements, business valuations where applicable, tax returns. The single most common reason courts strike down prenups is inadequate disclosure.
Step 5: Negotiate the substance through your attorneys
Separate property, marital property rules, debt allocation, business interests, inheritance, support, dispute resolution. Each attorney advocates for their client; both attorneys make sure the document is enforceable.
Step 6: Sign well before the wedding
At least 30 days. California requires 7 days minimum between final draft presentation and signing by statute. Signing the day before the wedding is the textbook duress fact pattern.
Common mistakes that derail the process
- Starting late. The closer to the wedding, the harder it is to defend against a duress claim later.
- Using the same attorney for both spouses. Saves money short-term, costs the entire agreement long-term.
- Skimping on disclosure. "Various accounts totaling around $X" doesn't survive a challenge. Specific values, statements, tax returns.
- Including unenforceable provisions (child custody, lifestyle clauses). They don't help and they signal careless drafting.
- Signing under emotional pressure. If the conversation is contentious, slow down. A document signed under duress isn't a defense against your partner's situation changing — it's a guarantee a court will throw it out.
What it costs
For most couples, total attorney fees run $1,500 to $7,500 — with complex estates running $10,000 to $20,000+. For state-specific cost data, see the state cost guide. To stress-test your specific situation against enforceability rules, take the prenup quiz.